A new national helpline is now active for men of color who need support as they navigate intimate partner violence. October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the Alliance for Boys and Men of Color (ABMoC) has launched a new campaign called Healing Together.
ABMoC has also partnered with another organization, Growing a New Heart, which focuses on providing transformative justice. JAC Patrissi is the founder of Growing a New Heart and also the co-founder of the domestic violence helpline, A Call For Change, that is a part of the campaign.
Patrissi said the following “We want the people we love ‘to be in good hands’ when they need help. Survivors who know they can’t stay with a violent partner that they still love need other men as those ‘good hands,’ in their community.” She continued, “Men need to practice mutual accountability to have the skills to hold each other accountable to be safe with their partners. It’s too heavy a lift, and it isn’t right to expect their abused partners to do this — men need other men’s help to support their healing and accountability and to create better examples for future generations.”
The goal of this campaign is to provide a safe space for men and people of all genders to create safer communities in order to address the ongoing issue of domestic violence, through receiving assistance through a 24/7 phone line known as A Call For Change.
Healing, gender justice, and racial equity over punishment are the main focal points members of the campaign and ABMoC hope to ignite change by not resorting to law enforcement and instead utilizing transformative justice methods such as the helpline. The helpline is for people of all genders and sexualities, although men of color are placed at the forefront of the campaign.
Data shows that 40 percent of Black men reported experiencing domestic physical violence, stalking, and sexual violence from their intimate partner, according to the Center for Sexual Assualt Survivors. According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH) Black people are 2.5 times more likely to experience intimate partner violence than white individuals, and this distinction is seen more in sexual violence, the study showed.
Patrissi also spoke about some common misconceptions that people have about those who are victims. She said that people often think domestic violence (DV) service providers and resources such as the helpline are colluding, meaning enabling abusive behavior instead of truly solving it. Also, people expressed concern that those who cause harm to their partners would only use the helpline as “a confessional, [receive] forgiveness, and then go out and cause harm again.”
She said that the concerns are fair given what people have seen, but “taking accountability” is an important factor for people causing harm to their partners.
“Compassion without accountability is collusion. Accountability without compassion is domination, and we work really hard to embody both. And that’s what we say to people who are really worried about this line. And what we’re finding is it works. People keep calling us back and practicing what we’re teaching them.”
Lead responder for the helpline, Regi Wingo, shared more insight about the helpline and its purpose of reaching men of color specifically. “What I have found most effective is meeting people where they’re at… I can sit down with you to build and really hear your story. I can hear where they’re coming from and I tell them [the aggressor] “you know that’s not right, it’s not the move.’” He continued, “Men, in general, have been raised and socialized in a patriarchal society that [focuses on dominance]. It is about being able to introduce tension in a non combative, non confrontational way, and thinking about how we can repair it.”
Lead organizer for the Healing Together Campaign, Christian Beauvoir, said the efforts have significantly impacted community discussions on accountability and intimate partner violence by advocating for policy changes, community-based culturally responsive solutions, and non-punitive, compassionate accountability models.
“In this moment of heightened criminalization in our communities, this helpline creates a really important access point for folks to be able to have safer relationships, and even, for themselves. Think about the current threats of deportation and ICE attacks like that are making people isolated at home, similar to what we saw during the covid pandemic,” said Beauvoir.
He continued, “Folks have increased stress, home stress such as housing insecurity, financial insecurity, food insecurity…These are instances in which domestic violence goes up,coupled with increased isolation.”
A Call For Change is a free and confidential helpline and is open from 10:00am to 10:00pm seven days a week, 365 days a year. They can be reached at 877-898-3411 and are accessible for all languages. Voicemails are also responded to within 24 hours if assistance is not met upon initially calling.